Enlightenment for the Locals

Listen Carefully

This page is about connecting all the dots in a way that just doesn't get done since many of those 'dots' are excluded from the information used to facilitate the  consensus reality. It is done that way of course, in order to keep the normal people, who are only trying to help genetic defectives such as myself, blame free and above reproach. Of course while overlooking information, adding some, altering some, ignoring some and spinning some, we humans tend to reinvent reality to accommodate that need. If we believe we already understand something, we tend to make reality fit into the current beliefs so we don't have to look any further and perhaps see something we would just rather not. Nevertheless, on THIS page for the local participants at least, we are going to look, listen and teach some old dogs some new tricks.


Though my readers elsewhere will not be able to get the same entertainment value out of this page like you locals will, I know they can relate to it on a certain level just the same, as many of them 'think' they have had similar experiences where they live also. We whack jobs sure all think alike don't we? But that's how you know we ARE whack jobs now isn't it? So for them, it will ring true and hopefully give them a few laughs at the absurdity of you normal folk where I live and your never ending capacity for 'hiding' in plain sight.


Free Handout for Reprogramming Awareness
From Now on the Local "Communities A.C.T.ing Out" stuff and the Municipal Enquirer type "Story" telling and Rumour Spreading (while it is being denied of course) will be posted on my Personal Facebook page for the entertainment of the people who need their daily fix. That is the page on which I do not accept any FB "friends" as my actual friends,  like psych survivours and activists, many of them professional as well, are connected to me elsewhere.  For you "National Enquirer" type minds though, please feel free to assess, interpret  and evaluate me, and my life, as defined by others, including total strangers, here:

The Estian Shift  

So it's the Bait, the position Switch right after the starting point, and the "shift" in meaning on the level of abstract ideas....

Let's see now....How shall I say all the SAME things today, in a slightly different way, so that everyone can just focus on the fact that I am doing that and/or how LONG I have BEEN doing it, in how many WAYS, without any of them actually HEARINGWHAT IT IS that I am saying in all these ways for all of this time? ...or even hearing WHY I am saying it.

Here we go then.

Only the guru of “recreation” is cause AND effect. Those who are “beneath him” in the infinite training represented by the pyramid of power, control and domination, are instructed to “choose” which “side” of the structure they prefer to be on, to choose cause OR effect. For “it” is "over their heads." (think in terms of concrete AND abstract meaning when you read or hear this “loaded language.” Has the guru then “transcended” the “choice” between the two sides? Is he the loser/winner, the Nazi/Jew, the controller/the controlled? Has this been done to him from HIS point of view by “integrating the opposites” in the Zen-like “cuteness”?

The “shift” in meaning of est itself is the “switch” with LIFE itself. For the masses can be manipulated to accept that it is LIFE that is meaningless and est that is meaningful when in reality – it's the opposite.

The definition of est BY e.s.t. IS "It is nothing. There is nothing to get so you get IT."

The trainees are supplying the abstract structure of It with the meaning THEY are projecting into It based on their OWN pre-set goals.  So in such cases, there is no CONCRETE evidence of INTENT to do harm, is there?

So the effect is?

Since "NOTHING happened", which is the end game, of the training, it is what everyone ASSUMES that to mean which defines outcomes. Of course the est-ee KNOWS that to say "nothing happened" is meaningless since he knows that "nothing" is the definition of est itself when the training is "finished." That part of course is kept "secret" from "non estians." This is why either you "get It" (understand it) OR you "get It" (IT gets you- for failing to see It as IT is.) It is also why you must then DOSOMETHING about It. Of course WHAT you do is left entirely up to the individual; either way. The guru after all, never tells people WHAT to think. (which we can see is a true statement, no matter what is driving the individual who makes it...)

If you understand the metaphysical structure ITSELF, as a THING in itself, you can then read all the same WORDS which you were already TOLD and the MEANING of those words is "shifted" even though the words THEMSELVES are exactly the SAME.

That happens IF you get all the way THROUGH It, which means you end up BACK at the point from where you started (full circle – infinite loop) where I am standing holding the "door" open for you (symbolically speaking...hold the Haldol) waving you OUT of the circular trap of It and back into the external reality you could not find your way back into by yourself. In other words, when you get out of IT, you also get IT out of you. That is how IT is resolved.

So NOW, do you "get" the nexus language? It's about the loaded language in what was known in It's time frame as, (get ready for the humour here...) The Human Potential MOVEMENT. For the point where the two sides meet is meaningless/meaningful which is the point of POTENTIAL meaning only, until one MOVES from the nexus of meaning to one "side" of the construct OR the other. Of course the "shift" off the nexus of meaning is connected to your own personal goal. So you should not compare what YOU get to what others in the training "get" as each one uses It in "whatever way seems useful to YOU.

Now given the MEANING, HEAR the duality of IT. Just use the often repeated instruction from the mental "health" professionals to "let it go"....

What does THAT mean- to YOU? (if you relate it to the est training)

 At first as an aggressor with a hidden agenda of domination


As a victim/target trying to get real help with the experience


As one of the masses of the "normal" who support the wide-eyed and mystified controller because in reality, they just don't get It, at ALL.

What does It mean to YOU?

Does it mean let It continue without end?


Does it mean leave this split minded paradigm of "Total control " OR "totally controlled" in our dysfunctional group past?

It IS all a "matter of your perspective on IT," isn't it?

That was a common saying about est back in the 70's. It went, "Reality is all a matter of perspective" and another one was, "There is no reality, only perception."

So then which role in the local dysfunctional group psycho-drama, complete with scapegoating, did YOU play? This IS "the game" in it's generic form.

Don't let IT go. Get over IT by understating It, and then giving IT the under-standing (integrated on both levels) which IT needs to make It disappear.

Start of the Action

Very often, all it really takes to trigger a large group invalidation session is for someone who is perceived as "less than" to say something which someone seeing himself as "more than", either doesn't understand, or doesn't like.

The "more than" individual, who often lives in contest mode, while the one being defined as "less than" does not, reacts to the perceived 'threat" to his statue or power or control. To maintain that, he often involves third parties, frequently "secretly" in order to make the situation between the original pair look and sound the way HE wants it to look and sound.

"They do it because it works." (estian power and control concept)

Those of you locally still involved in the "nothing" that happened here:

YOU ARE the "group contagion" and the "chain reactions" which are defined by Fenwick as the stated "effects" of the training. Inside the training it is demonstrated concretely as the trainer says that only the one at the START of the action is "at cause" and everyone else is just "effect, effect, effect." (which actually isn't true BUT that is in the training. In reality, each person in the chain is both cause AND effect, in turn.

Of course it is less likely that anyone would develop a huge ego about being "at cause" if they said that. Still the "chain reaction" is generated by the estian script used BY the one taking the position at the starting point who has set his goal FIRST.

Now tell me....would THAT indicate intent to YOU if the self defined est-ee nurse wrote down an actual quote from it and the people who employed him had seen it? Remember now that these are the SAME people who all "corrected" me by telling me that "there is/was no est exercise going on with the staff at Homewood and THIS is what I am to "let go."

Also keeping mind that I tried for an entire DECADE from 93 - 2003 while using discretion, to get them to deal with this directly and all my attempts failed.

So now, in my own case, keep this in mind:

The guru understands MORE than the est-ee nurse trainee. So to actually find out the degree of intent directed AT me, (bearing in mind he was told he was the "director" of the movie he had going in his head) you would have to look at the concrete details, which are STILL multiple choice, as acted out for me by the whole community. When you sort out the truth, from the half truths, from the outright fabrications of others, you then need to look at the kind of direction the third parties were given by the est-ee nurse.

THAT will prove intent, or degree of intent, acknowledging that some LEVEL of intent is indicated in his previously written responses to me such as the "booby prize" quote.

So from back then, 95-99, as I was starting to break down mentally (described in the est training by the way as "we're gonna tear you down and rebuild you") I told my supervisor at the health care agency that I thought I needed a good cop a lot more than I needed a psychiatrist since a good cop is at least willing to LOOK at any evidence rather than just hear "symptoms" for complaining about being "harmed" by someone.

For those of you who say of my experience, while focused solely on me of course, "Well I just don't know WHAT to believe anymore..."

THAT is one of the desired 'effects' of the est training. It generates a multiple choice "reality" in which the controllers (those "at cause") and in "total control" while "creating and defining reality itself for all non estians" can successfully HIDE their agendas of domination. So get OFF the level of sorting out the multiple choice "stories", many of which are still being repeated, and ONTO the level of knowing that the multiple choice "stories" are a part of the script and the creation of an "alternate reality" is the point of doing that. The entire training script ITSELF is what you need to understand; not which VERSION of reality the manipulated mob is buying into NOW. The chaos is generated so that you WON'T see the script being used to generate IT.

If those trained in the dysfunctional script whether NAMED (like est) or not, would give up deciding whose "side" they were on in a relationship you are not in (personalities) and instead focus on what is wrong with the script ITSELF (principles) we could all work at changing the world and get out of the chaos. Instead they are still "invalidating me to validate themselves." (yet another estian concept)

Of course, since you threaten the dysfunctional script by doing that, the controllers who have their authoritarian power threatened, really aren't going to like you at all. Of course they spend a lot of time counting on your need to be popular or get their approval to keep you silent.

RISK being unpopular now and then. You will usually live through it and because you do, maybe your influence will help the world get off it's "game", in it's extreme forms too and maybe even stop thinking it's all right and even "normal" to drop bombs on hospitals and even pre-schoolers as a "solution" for dealing with "them" OR "us" and calling IT "winning."

So is the guru fully AWARE of what he is doing? God knows. If he is, the guru knows too. I don't. But then I am not the all knowing ONE. I am just an equal "cell" in the body of the whole of BEING.

I do know who I am, even if the majority continue to define me by "group consensus" backed up by "authority." In reality, the one I live in, THEY are the ones who need to give up their "game."

"It's about responsibility."

Another true statement of est. WHAT about it?

Does it mean accepting it WHEN it's yours?

Accepting it when it's NOT yours?

Denying it when it's yours?

Denying it when it's not yours?

(four sided abstraction) There is no meaning APART from concrete specific details and "stories" or rumours are not enough. 

It is about responsibility for WHAT exactly. (rational thought)

It is not defined by WHO is playing the "game." (irrational dysfunctional group-think)

Current Blog Article: The Estian Shift  

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Patricia, Site Owner

Paranoid Patty Predicts 

This is a new feature I am adding here for those of you who like to 'test' me to see if I am 'psychic.' As the social worker and a nurse once acted out for me on H3, “she really believes that doesn't she......” of course, I can't roll my eyes with disdain here like one can in person, but I am sure you get the idea.

Yes you charming folks, I actually DO believe that I can 'see' things that others can't and that my ability to 'see' them makes it possible for me to 'see' a bit ahead in time. So let us have some 'fun' here listening to some of my idiotic predictions shall we? ...Just for the entertainment value of it. I know you can relate to that as look at all the 'fun' you have had with me already...


Look below in the blog section for new predictions.

Psychiatric Zen

Simple yet not easy

Your gossiping and rumour spreading and my paranoid delusions and hallucinated conversations are

Wow. Ever amazing.

 For All of the Locals with So Very Much to Say...

...and Who Have all Those Opinions You Feel Entitled to Express 

This is especially for those of you who have so enjoyed giving me little ''tests'' to see what kind of a reaction you can get... 

This website IS my reaction.

I hope that you enjoy ''getting it'' (har har har,   nudge, wink, right back at-cha) as much as I am now enjoying giving it to you.

Now....you won't take that the wrong way; will you?