Questioning Normality

Defining Normal

By Patricia Lefave, Monophrenic

In dysfunctional groups "normal" does not equate to psycho-spiritually healthy.

"Normal" equates to "common."

That means that whatever the group consensus agrees upon as acceptable becomes "normal' thinking and behaviour.

So, if forming a lynch mob is accepted by the group then it's normal to be part of a lynch mob and conversely ABNORMAL (anti-social) to refuse to join or even speak out against it. The 'normal' group members will then engage in mocking, ridiculing, pressuring and isolating the abnormal one for not being a 'team" player.

You know what 'they' say, "There is no 'I' in team.

Actually, there IS. And some of us have our eye on the team and its group dynamic, which is why the 'team' tries to blind us to the truth. The team members don't want anyone looking too closely at the obvious.

You see, to those of us who are on the receiving end of the group insanity, 1+1=2.

To the group members though, 1+1=11 and EVERYBODY knows THAT! So if we who 'think' that 1+1=2 don't know that, then we are to the group members stupid and /or crazy, which then justifies the group which treats us 'as if' their consensus definition of us was "reality."

It really IS like being in two different universes; same WORDS; split MEANING.

We have trouble making sense of the senseless, and when a psychiatrist asks us if we are "having trouble making sense of things," we most often 'admit' that.


We must be inherently flawed according to the group consensus on reality since the group is not having any trouble at all making sense of things. If this were not the case then it might mean that the group would be flawed for believing that being part of a lynch mob was normal.

How could anyone in their right mind question that?

On Popularity

Vampires are popular with other vampires because they all suck the blood of their victims TOGETHER. They also reassure each other that they can't help it it is just the way life is. They prefer to think of their blood baths as 'socializing." It makes them FEEL better just as blood sucking makes them FEEL better and with vampires it is all about how THEY feel. They support and reinforce their beliefs in each other and call that "friendship."

Vampires believe that they are normal too and that those who don't suck the life's blood out of others are abnormal. Vampirism therefore is "good" because they only suck the life's blood out of the 'abnormal' and therefore 'really' they are doing the world a favour. Ridding the world of defectives.....really...they are helping to save the world...right Dracula?

If only the abnormal could be more like the vampire. But unfortunately studies have now shown the abnormal suffer from an illness known as Exsanguination Phobia. With a serious disorder like that[1] they are probably better off dead anyways so really, that is another good thing about being a vampire. Its the altruism which is a natural part of just being one.

If only everyone could become a blood sucker the world would be a better place. Maybe we could vote a Vampire into a political position of leadership on the next round and then they could make it mandatory for everyone to convert to Vampirism!

Why... I think that creating and defining reality for everyone really does have limitless possibilities as long as the 'right' people are the ones who tell everyone else what words really mean.

[1] Axis II


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When you open your mind to the impossible, sometimes you find the truth.

Walter, The Mad Scientist On Fringe


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Patricia, Site Owner

How to Use These Public Posting Boards

We can use these public boards as a means of collective contact amongst psychiatric survivour/ex mental patients. 

(Interacting with the non- psychiatrized as well where appropriate) As with all sites like mine, this is a good way to get out of psycho-social isolation, feel connected to those with similar experiences, and to share what helps and what does not.

Please remember that this one is a PUBLIC board so that anyone can see what you have to say. I personally have access to your addresses and e-mails when you register but you do not have to use your real name or otherwise expose your identity. The server owner also has access to anything you post here as well but it will not be used in any way UNLESS you say something that is breaking the laws.

I want to keep my ‘G’ rating so that a ten year old could read this without blushing, feeling frightened or learning new words that would shock even me as an old lady... so watch your way of expressing yourself please. I do not have a lot of time on line so if anyone notices a problem with any posts please bring it to my attention by sending me an e-mail directing me, by title, to the problem post. E-mail me at:

Remove the word SPAMAWAY and close the space.

Please download the two PDF files below regarding how to use the boards and the software.

1.   Posting in the First Person Singular Style

This one is about the simple method of use

2.   Registering, Signing in and Using the Software

This one is about the physical use of the site software and gives a step by step direction.

Both are in the PDF files below and can be downloaded to a computer, flash drive or opened and read online here.

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Who Defines the Normal and Why?
The Focus on this interactive page is going to be on the perspective we don't hear much about: the Normal group member and his or her role in the design and diagnosis of the assigned illness, given to the individual who gets psychiatrized, often for 'complaining' about his/her experience with 'others' as well as the Normal's function as a part of a Normal group.

Here we will shift the focus OFF of the psychiatrized one and ONTO the group as a whole, and some of its other members in particular.


I believe we need to take another look at 'Normal' and how it all got to be considered to BE 'Normal. In doing so we may just find that a whole lot of what is now considered to be 'Normal' might better be described as 'common' or ‘habit.' Longstanding dysfunctional relating for example is very often called “Normal' by those who are used to it, who want to stay 'popular' in their group by keeping silent, or who “don't want to make waves “in the name of “getting along.” Often of course, those who are “getting along” are not really “getting along” with everyone and are part of a well practised scapegoating system. 

So if you have some stories of your “Normal' experiences, this is the page for that.


As usual on these pages, please follow the few simple rules of communication and talk about; ideas or experiences generally, your own personal experiences without naming proper names, your feelings, your experiences  of the mental illness system, good or bad, in relation to your own personal experience with it.  Keep it connected on this page though to defining and questioning what is considered to be “Normal” thinking and behaviour. Do NOT name names, as this is a public board and liability laws apply. Keeping your sharing in the first person singular and/or in relation to ideas or concepts allows you to have your say and keeps you and me, safe from harm or legal problems at the same time.


Above is the PDF Copy of the practical use of the Bulletin Board and how the software at this site works for you personally. 

To use this Board you DO have to register to this site in just the same way you do in any support group BUT this discussion is not closed to the public.